Skinny, klutzy kids always have dreaded the senior prom

freshmess.jpgThis was a pretty cool article about an observant principal and his solution to a Prom for everybody to enjoy..🙂

We have no date. We have no money. We cannot dance. We’ve never worn a tux or a ball gown. We are too fat. We are too skinny. We are too ugly. The list goes on and on encyclopedically. And each day brings it 24 hours nearer, as all around us the excitement rises like an ocean tide in which we will undoubtedly drown, socially obliterated and globally warmed.


Skinny, klutzy kids always have dreaded the senior prom
Carl Larsen Petty Larseny

It looms on the high school horizon, ominous as an algebra final and as huge as a nose pimple. It seems as distant as the front of the cafeteria food line, yet creeps steadily ever nearer.

It is the dreaded senior prom. At many local high schools, plans for the prom are already well under way, and for some young socialites (the “With-It Crowd,” of course) the event will doubtlessly be the crowning cherry atop a four-year cruise through education.

Rented tuxes, corsages and stretch limos float through the fantasies of the Socially Accepted, and all I can say is: One person’s vision of rapture is another guy’s nightmare.

For to those of us (the majority, I fear) who have inhabited the great lumbering herd of clueless, classless, klutzy everyday students, the senior prom is just another opportunity to publicly display our embarrassing ineptness at attempting anything remotely resembling civilized.

We have no date. We have no money. We cannot dance. We’ve never worn a tux or a ball gown. We are too fat. We are too skinny. We are too ugly. The list goes on and on encyclopedically. And each day brings it 24 hours nearer, as all around us the excitement rises like an ocean tide in which we will undoubtedly drown, socially obliterated and globally warmed.

Ah, how one’s heart goes out to all those young people who must traverse this strange rite of passage. Do your best, my children! Buck up, stumble through it and be assured that the next day it will be just a horrible dream.

Back in my day, things were, of course, better. And even though I was as void of social graces as an average wart hog, the senior prom at Torrance High School was as much fun for me and the rest of the debate team as it was for any of the really cool kids.

Our beloved school principal, realizing that 90 percent of the students were mere clods such as I, simply rented the massive Student Union building at nearby El Camino College, announced that the senior prom was going to be an all-night, come-as-you-are, no-formal-date class party, and threw open the doors to everyone. Why, even the teachers were invited.

And although a few fuddy-duddies complained, most of us deemed it total redemption. Slowly, painfully, we learned a little dance floor courtesy whilst Patti Page, Hank Williams and Frank Sinatra crooned into our freshly washed ears.

Best of all, for that one endless magical night, everyone in the senior class — from the football heroes and fashionistas down to us geeks and grubs — was completely equal in every way.

I still cherish it.

Write News Leader columnist Carl Larsen at carllarsen@alltell.net

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